We go through a lot of stuff, situations, moments, incidents that break us, weaken us, and make this world look like an impossible place to live. Life looks like some kind of exam no one prepared us for and that is true actually, how many of us have the degree from “the school of life”? No one, because there is no such university in the first place. We learn through our experiences, we learn through attempting, trying, failing, and then trying again. We deal with downfalls and heartbreaks.
What follows such downfalls and suffering is an effort to rise, the difficult choice of wanting to “move on”, of wanting to finally “let go” of what has been hurting us. Once the process of healing begins, we feel our “difficult days” are over. We don’t expect them to be a part of this process. But that’s where we make ourselves unprepared and vulnerable to the coming twists and turns.
We do heal after we’re broken, and healing requires time, patience, love, and self-acceptance. Unlike what we might assume it to be, Healing is not linear.
It’s not a straight path you can simply walk on and never look back. It is not all about positivity, growth, and accomplishments. Even while healing, not every morning you would feel like getting up from the little comfort bubble you have created around yourself. Not everyday life will embrace you with open arms.
After everything feels silver and golden and you feel like you’re getting your sparkle back, there will still be such days. The days when your eyes don’t shine while talking about your passions, your dreams. The days when you barely drag yourself for the daily chores as your favorite song plays in the background, the song that would otherwise keep you dancing around the house.
The days when the marks on your skin, the ‘unwanted’ curves, and other “imperfections” of your body draw your attention, a bit more than usual. The days when you feel lonely, misunderstood by the people whom you thought knew you to the core.
Days when self-love appears like a distant idea and self-acceptance a dreadful challenge. Days when your heart, the stupid optimist that urges to spill colors of happiness in every other heart, barely manages to exist in black & white. Days when you feel inadequate. Not worthy, not enough.
Days when breathing feels like a task, days when you just don’t feel like being yourself. All such days, it may look like you are back to square one, but you can never lose the progress you have made on this path, you can never be back to square one.
Some days are hard and for all such days, surviving is what you should be applauded for. All such days, pat yourself on the back, give yourself some credit and shower yourself with the kindness you have in store for the world. All such days, remind yourself that nothing so far went in vain, remind yourself of the completeness that you are, know that at times it’s okay to just ‘Be’, to just exist without moving mountains. Every time you feel like you are not doing enough or not being enough, Remember, YOUR BEING, IS ENOUGH.
Doesn’t matter if there’s no outer accomplishment or person telling you this, you are worthy irrespective of anything. You are existing and your existence is magic in itself. Trust your journey, have faith in yourself that you will get there.
You will get there!!